How to give a spontaneous review that becomes valued

I was recently at a small Christmas market arranged by the Swedish Church in Belgium. The market takes place in small house in the city, and they are creative when it comes to how to use the space. During the weekend, around 2000 people visit the market, which truly shows how Swedes like to celebrate Christmas time. They sell glögg, saffron bread and of course have a café where you can fika.

A few days after the event, one of the arrangers asked me what I thought about the event and the marketing of it. My spontaneous response was to mention that I liked that it was so Swedish and then I instantly went to suggesting improvements. The man who asked me was very happy for my suggestions as I presented them in a constructive way, and asked if I would be around to help contributing the planning of next year’s market.

But, even though I had a positive reaction to my suggestions, I really began thinking about the fact that even though I liked the market I had more to say about what could have been done better than what was actually good. As I’m usually a very positive person it took me by surprise that this was my spontaneous answer. Have years of university studies made me so “good” a giving constructive criticism that this now is how I encounter situations and questions like this? Or is it just human nature? Either way, can I change this behavior?

The reason why I am asking is that even though it is good to get constructive criticism, sometimes people really do not want it if they have not asked for it. So, is it actually good to start giving it away?

If you are new at a company you can get a head by sharing your ideas and show that you are creative, but if you do it too much people might begin to feel that you are not a team player since you do not fit in to the routine that the team have built for years. Could it be the same way with a review of an event etc, by focusing too much on different improvements, will the arranger just think that you where not the “target visitor” as the event in general did not appeal to you and therefore not consider you suggestions? I guess you won’t be as directly affected in the second scenario but maybe in the long run.

Let’s say that you attend an event and is later asked about your opinions. If you try first to complement the things, you liked about the event and then only make one or two constructive comments. There is a big change that the arranger will consider your suggestions and event ask you for more. Because the arranger will first consider you as a targeted visitor as you appealed to the event in general, and thus be open for a suggested improvement. He or she might even ask you for more of your opinions.

In the future, the event arranger might even remember your thoughtful suggestion and positive attitude, that he or she, might suggest you to share your ideas with someone else, and all of a sudden your opinion is valued. This would probably not have happened if you had shared all your ideas, even if they were presented in a good way.

Thus, my lesson from this is to try to stay positive when I leave the schoolbooks. There are far too many complaints in the world. What do you think? What is you spontaneous reaction in this scenario? Do you think it pays off to focus on the positive side of things?

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